FACING OUR WRITING FEARS CONFIDENTLY

Writers like all people have fears and doubts. Maybe it's because of the creative process that's involved with writing, but maybe it’s because writers tend to be a little more passionate, a little more emotional, and a little more sensitive than others.

Most of our anxieties and worries begin with the “What if. . .?” What if I can’t write the next chapter? What if I can’t finish this novel? What if I get writer’s block? What if I’m not able to edit the manuscript correctly? What if I’m not creative? What if my critique partner or group hates it? What if the readers don’t like it? What if I can’t get it published?

Amid all these distracting worries, depression takes hold, often preventing us from doing our best—and our biggest fear actually becomes self-fulfilling and we do nothing.

How do we break the cycle?

ANALYZE -- First, ask yourself: Are my fears rational? How many of my past fears have come true? What was my biggest fear this time last week, last month, last year? What is the worst thing that can happen? The answers will help you put your fears in perspective. 

PRIORITIZE -- If you decide your fears are grounded, the worst thing you can do is worry. Worry is negative believing and leads to paralysis. Instead, devise a plan. Make it active and positive. Decide what steps need to be taken and the order in which you need to take them. Remember, the one sure cure for writer’s block is sitting yourself down in front of the computer and starting to type. Write anything. Just start. Put some sentences or thoughts swirling around in your head on paper. Or start typing: "The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dog" over and over again. I guarantee you’ll start writing something different and better after a few short rounds of that boring maneuver. 

VISUALIZE -- To turn your plan into reality spend a few minutes each day visualizing success. See yourself completing that project or manuscript. Imagine everyone’s pleased reaction. Imagine your pleased reaction. And think about the pride you’ll feel and rewards you’ll reap.

Remember, fear will never go away as long as we continue to grow. The only way to get rid of fear and to feel better about ourselves is to go out and do whatever we fear. After all, pushing through our fear is less frightening that living with the underlying fear that comes from a feeling of helplessness.  

            Life is like a winding road--full of bumps, uphill climbs, and many curves.

Perfection in Our Work

Aristotle said, "Pleasure in the job puts perfection in the work.”

As the world spins and as I grow older, the more I’m convinced the American worker has lost pride and the ability to strive for excellence. Okay, I admit, at times I’m a perfectionist, a little over the top in being highly organized. And yes, I do have a checkbook that balances right to the penny. But the office where I write is a little messy, so that drops me from an A+ personality to an A- one, I guess.

The other evening my husband and I went to what I formerly considered a nice restaurant--and out of kindness, I will not reveal its name. The only way to describe the experience was less than stellar. It was not overcrowded. There were plenty of hired help to wait on tables, and it was early in the evening, prior to the rush hour.

So what was the problem? The glass of wine I ordered came in a dirty glass. The soup I ordered never came with the meal. In fact, it never came at all. My husband’s ordered a more expensive, more extensive seafood platter and was served the early bird special with less items on the plate. I forgot my black long-sleeved over shirt on the seat when I left, and low and behold, when my husband went back sometime later to check. . .it was still there. No one obviously checks the seat when they bus the tables which means if the seat is dirty, it will stay that way for the next customer. 

What happened in this restaurant is happening all over in America. Everyone is just trying to get it done, not caring whether it’s done right, done with pride, or with a care for excellence. Someone said not to sweat the small stuff. But isn’t it the accumulation of little things that make the total experience? Isn’t it the sum of all the little things we do every day with an eye for excellence and with a pleasurable attitude that leads to perfection in our work. . .and in our service to others? 

I believe writers have the same obligation to their audience as any other worker in any other occupation. But that’s a topic for next time.

GOAL SETTING - The Zig Ziglar Way

With 2013 here, it' time to start setting goals for the new year ahead. But how to you go about it?

There is probably no better advice on goal setting than that of Zig Ziglar, who recently passed away in November at the age of 86 years old. He was a world-renown, motivational speaker who used easy-to-remember, homespun simplicity when he addressed an audience.

Born in Alabama, Zig Ziglar served in the Navy in World War II and later worked as a salesman in a succession of companies before he became a vice president and training director in Dallas, Texas. He is best known for his many books and seminars on topics that teach a person how to be successful, how to set goals, how to network, and how to be a top sales or marketing person.

“See You at The Top,” both a famous book and video, spells out the benefits a person can achieve from setting goals. Ironically, “See You at the Top” was rejected by some thirty publishers. 

Some of the benefits include: knowing, being, doing and having more; using your mind and talents fully; having more purpose and direction in life; making better decisions; being more organized and effective; doing more for yourself and others; having greater confidence and self-worth; feeling more fulfilled; being more enthusiastic and motivated; and accomplishing uncommon projects.

To reach the benefits above, Zig Ziglar set forth the “Seven Steps for Goal Setting.” These seven steps are used in adult classrooms, workshops and seminars all over the United States since their inception in 1975. 

1. Identify the goal or objective you want to achieve

2. Set a deadline and put a date on it.

3. List the obstacles to overcome

4. Identify the people or groups to work with

5. List skills or knowledge needed

6. Develop a plan of action

7) List the benefits – “What’s in it for me?”

Although it’s impossible to comment on all seven steps, defining a goal is certainly the first action step. According to Zig Ziglar, a goal is anything you can have, be or do. Have includes such things as a new car, home or boat. Be simply means your desire to be someone: a mayor, surpervisor, saleman, inventor, or writer. And do entails something you wish to do over a period of time such as improve your health, play a musical instrument, quit smoking, write a book, or develop a better relationship with someone. According to Zig Ziglar,

“If you want to reach a goal, you must 'see the reaching' 

in your mind before you actually arrive at your goal."

What goals have you set for 2013? I'm working on my list and will give you a peek in my next post. Until then, have a great New Year.    

Second Helpings - A Collection of Holiday Short Stories and Recipes

From sweet childhood remembrances to fanciful solutions of family dramas to romantic relationships that begin--or end--during the holidays, SECOND HELPINGS is an anthology of stories and memories, but most especially of recipes. Our end-of-the-year celebrations are occasions that bring reunions with unforgettable feasts and that one special, treasured dish. At the end of each story, vignette, reminiscence, you'll find a recipe or collection of recipes that will make your next holiday memorable as well.

SECOND HELPING - A collection of short stories and recipes contains my short story, "Danny's Secret," which tells the plight of a sister whose brother died in the Gulf in 1990. Danny had a family heirloom as a good luck charm, a pearl ring, that was never returned with his personal effects. It had been carried by  his great grandfather in World War I, his grandfather in World War II, and his father in the Vietnam War. Twenty years later, Kay Holland is still searching for answers to its disappearance, especially since her mother is dying and requesting to see it.

SECOND HELPINGS has a series of tasty recipes, including my recipe for molasses cookies. Pick up a copy and read what a pearl ring and molasses cookies have in common. It's available in print and e-book formats.

Buy it now at  Second Wind Publishing

or at  Amazon.com